Should I Confess to the Ex?

Joined: 02 Sep 2008 Location: Cooma

Finally have all the CSA b***shit sorted, custody, assets all that & things pretty amicable between me and ex.

We were together for about 10 years and a couple of times I did the dirty on her. I'm fairly certain she did the same, but just want to know for sure if she did. Should I tell her & hope she'll do the same, or just keep my mouth shut. Trouble is if I keep my mouth shut, she now lives near a few mates who aren't mates now for one reason or another so I'd rather she found out from me not from them, although she could turn into a real biatch if she found out either way. Fkd if I do, fkd if i don't

Joined: 25 Oct 2003 Location: Melbourne Australia

That's the best 7th post ever.

Joined: 21 Aug 2006 Location: nowhere interesting

robdel wrote:

... Fkd if I do, fkd if i don't

Yup. And your valid complaint would be...?

Joined: 21 May 2004 Location: Brisbane North

1: Tell her
2: Video the confession
3: Upload to youtube
4: Link here
5: Good luck

But really, why do you want to know? She's your ex, who cares.

Joined: 10 Jun 2004 Location: North West Qld

chimpboy wrote:

That's the best 7th post ever.

Yeah but look at the advanced search and grave dig skills!

Can't advise on the coming clean thing.

I confessed to my ex that I faked my orgasms, though.

Joined: 25 Oct 2003 Location: Melbourne Australia

RAY185 wrote:

But really, why do you want to know? She's your ex, who cares.

Hrmph, see you just don't remember what it's like to be a teenager!

Joined: 28 Nov 2002 Location: Melbourne

IMHO why the fark would you want to bring something like this up? Seriously, what good could come of it?

If you're feeling guilty, go and confess your sins at church and do 10 Hail Marys, otherwise if I were you I'd keep my mouth shut.

Seriously, what good could it do? If you two are finally amicable, then you're just going to hurt her again.

Joined: 02 Sep 2008 Location: Cooma

Quote:

RAY185
Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 10:52 am

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1: Tell her
2: Video the confession
3: Upload to youtube
4: Link here
5: Good luck

But really, why do you want to know? She's your ex, who cares.

Would consider youtube if it was financially beneficial Laughing

Yeah, you're rite, who really cares. Just figure, she's gonna find out either way, at least if I know about her she can't do the pure as fresh snow routine with me down the track.

Quote:

Hrmph, see you just don't remember what it's like to be a teenager!

huh?

Joined: 27 Nov 2002 Location: Lost in Melbourne.

robdel wrote:

DOOR 1: I tell her & hope she'll do the same,
DOOR 2: just keep my mouth shut.

Door #2 for $1000 thanks.

Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 11:04 am

Barnsey wrote:

chimpboy wrote:

That's the best 7th post ever.

Yeah but look at the advanced search and grave dig skills!

Can't advise on the coming clean thing.

I confessed to my ex that I faked my orgasms, though.

Did she then explain the kids???

Joined: 13 Dec 2004 Location: Sunny Coast, Queensland

robdel wrote:

Finally have all the CSA b***shit sorted, custody, assets all that & things pretty amicable between me and ex.

We were together for about 10 years and a couple of times I did the dirty on her. I'm fairly certain she did the same, but just want to know for sure if she did. Should I tell her & hope she'll do the same, or just keep my mouth shut. Trouble is if I keep my mouth shut, she now lives near a few mates who aren't mates now for one reason or another so I'd rather she found out from me not from them, although she could turn into a real biatch if she found out either way. Fkd if I do, fkd if i don't

Mate she might suspect you did it and that could probably cause enough hurt as it is just like you suspect she did it. But nothing is more concrete that a confession that's neither forced or required.

Personally my advice would be to keep your mouth shut, and try to maintain some level of respect for each other's feelings.

Joined: 03 Jan 2007 Location: Melbourne, Australia

RAY185 wrote:

1: Tell her

3: Upload to youtube
4: Link here

All over it like a rash, quality lolertube..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJeWvWAVqLw

Joined: 15 Jan 2004 Location: Melbourne

If she's you ex, why does it matter? Do you want to feel better for cheating on her by hoping she'll tell you that she cheated as well?

HTFU and move on.

Joined: 19 Mar 2008 Location: yinnar sth victoria

i agree with emo do you wana know if she did so you dun feel so bad( no offence intended)
the past is the past
let it be your gonna have times wen its up and down between you two so why rock the boat

Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 12:01 pm

robdel wrote:

break.com pay for videos!

Joined: 02 Sep 2008 Location: Cooma

I spose my point is, wouldn't it be better for her to find out from me than a third party.

And yes, it would make me feel better when she can't pretend she's as white as snow down the track, we're all human Rolling Eyes

Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 12:15 pm

How long ago did it happen?

How long ago did you leave her?

How old are your kids?

Joined: 13 Dec 2004 Location: Sunny Coast, Queensland

robdel wrote:

I spose my point is, wouldn't it be better for her to find out from me than a third party.

And yes, it would make me feel better when she can't pretend she's as white as snow down the track, we're all human Rolling Eyes

Relevant points no doubt and we can see from your posts here you are still hurting but really, the best advice I can give is to just forget the past and move on with the future. If she finds out then deal with it then. If she's not as white as snow then maybe she won't give a toss ... who knows but just focus on the future and forget the past, you're wasting your valuable time and energy.

Do you have good support mechanisms around you (eg family, mates?) If so talk with them as they know your circumstances and you best and wil lprobably be able to give better advice than any of us.

Joined: 28 Nov 2002 Location: Melbourne

robdel wrote:

I spose my point is, wouldn't it be better for her to find out from me than a third party.

Tell the 3rd party to mind their own farking business!! Particularly considering the relationship is dead and buried. I'd understand if it was a concerned mate of hers and it was while you were still dating, but after the fact? Forget it.

Joined: 04 Jan 2006 Location: Western Sydney

robdel wrote:

I spose my point is, wouldn't it be better for her to find out from me than a third party.

And yes, it would make me feel better when she can't pretend she's as white as snow down the track, we're all human Rolling Eyes

Time to move on. No need to discuss things with her that do not involve your children. Just leave it. If she brings it up just say you do not want to bring up the past as the relationship is dead and buried you just want to maintain a professional relationship for you kids.

Who cares about the white as snow.

Do you just want to know that she did it to make you feel better? If so refer to my paragraph above.

Joined: 29 May 2003 Location: hidin frm da wiminz!!!

I rooted her twice. There she is dark as a double choc chip cookie in a chocolate fondu (sp?) basin mixed with oreos!

Be good to your kids!

Joined: 13 Dec 2004 Location: Sunny Coast, Queensland

GRIMACE wrote:

I rooted her twice. There she is dark as a double choc chip cookie in a chocolate fondu (sp?) basin mixed with oreos!

Can always count on you to bring some crass humour in to the subject Anthony Very Happy

GRIMACE wrote:

Be good to your kids!

And then you come up with this gem ... well said.

Joined: 10 Jun 2004 Location: North West Qld

GRIMACE wrote:

Be good to your kids!

If you both make all your decisions based on what's the best outcome for the children, you wont go wrong.

That's my formula for a happy seperation (when there's kids involved) ..........but it takes two, though Crying or Very sad

Joined: 25 Oct 2003 Location: Melbourne Australia

Barnsey wrote:

GRIMACE wrote:

Be good to your kids!

If you both make all your decisions based on what's the best outcome for the children, you wont go wrong.

What about if there's a good chance they're actually Grimace's children?

Joined: 01 May 2005 Location: Ferntree Gully

Say nought and if the ex mates put you in, deny, deny, deny... They're prolly up to their nuts in her guts while they're telling her so go the 'tearful, how could you think such a thing' look if she confronts you and make the mates look like arses...

Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 5:38 pm

Ok I'm confused should I Question

1 Lock this thread
2 Delete this thread
3 Move this thread
4 Put on Barnsey's tin foil hat & run around the house screaming the voices won't stop.

Joined: 29 Nov 2004 Location: Townsville

Joined: 18 Jan 2003 Location: perth wa

"CANADA" wrote:

#4

x2

Joined: 06 Sep 2005 Location: S/E QLD

Loose lips sink ships... keep your gob shut...........

Joined: 12 Sep 2003 Location: Gold Coast

Why did you cheat on her? Was she fat and sh!t? I don't understand the reasons why people cheat on there partners.. so thats the only reason I can come up with..

I sure as f$ck wouldnt be happy if I found out my misses was rooting around, so why would you do it to her knowing how she'd feel? and then boast about it on here with the whole should I tell her sh!t.....and especially if you've had kids..?